Cyber Qualias - is Bowie to blame for all this ?

[Guest]

[Mr. Goldberg]

The age of the cyber qualia...the alter ego is upon us. From Bolshy Dandies to Trixy Vixies as a schizophrenic form of 21st century cyber Catharsis. It's SIMS meets DOOM....it's the Roman Forum meets fancy dress...but to what end ? Who's to blame ? Dave Bowie (in my opinion) got it all going via reinventing himself through Major Tom, Ziggy Stardust, Cracked Actor, Aladdin Sane, Diamond Dog, Young American and Thin White Duke...to such a point whereby we thought we could all do it, digging up the Velvet Goldmine to remodel our own inner personas.

Next Sunday's Mail on Sunday newspaper will include a totally gratis, free and for nothing copy of his latest album "iselect". A collection of Bowie's greatest hits chosen by the grandad chameleon himself. Reinventing his bank balance yet again with stuff he put down 30 years ago, inviting a new generation of Bowiefreaks to join in the circus if they belong to a Mail on Sunday reading Momma or Poppa. Or rather there's a record company breathing down his neck screaming " Come on Dave...it's New Album time...where is it ?" 

To which the Fat Well paid Duke, Ciggy Tardust replies  singing :

 " Hey Man ...why dontcha leave me alone...
I said Hey Man...I'll rehash the big hits from home
...I said hey man I got no spunk anymore
But I'll grab your son and daughter with a penchant like before...
I don't need inspiration with another set of ditties
Cos I'm in re-release City..."   

A very shrewd business move ensuring every Daily Mail reading family gets a freebie tantalising seduction with a top track from each of his greatest albums after Sunday dinner to those under 40's as yet uninitiated into Bowie Freakery who will then (he hopes) go shopping in HMV and mop up his entire back catalogue. Freak out. Far out. In out.

Who's gonna buy it this Sunday ? And Is There Life on Mars ?

[Mr. Goldberg]

Dont wanna sound like a con man but Bowie's free album in this Sunday's Mail On Sunday ( RRP £1.40). Cheapest Bowie album you'll ever get plus full commentary in supplement magazine by the man himself.

[Ploe]

My initial cyber ego was a young demon named Tadcatlipoctil Fildela Malade Nuit. A mouthful I know. We shortened it to Tadius. It was the October of 2003. It was on MSN Chat. The channel Dark Midgar, a roleplay site based in the world of the game Final Fantasy VII.

We fought Gods and the vicious Aryans, we bumbled, we were romantic, we fucked, we crossed over into a world based on The Merrie City (Wakefield), we lived in a text based world. A piece of continuous prose forged by four or five minds at a time. It was amazing.

My point? I forget...

[Mr. Goldberg]

Point ?  Shmoint !!! Who needs a point when you got more splitz in yer personality than a pair of ripped jeans ?  Cascade the qualias...bring on the rhaposody of alter egos. Who's they ? They know who they are: they . Them. The Others. All inside my head and soon in yours. 

[Ploe]

Why are the personas of this forum not chatting up to this? They know who I'm talking to...

[Mr. Goldberg]

They make you wonder why they bother.....

[Ploe]

Cyber Qualias, ey? When this forum was a babe, fresh from our Editor's fine loins, still covered in blood and piss and shit... the vinegar came. A young man. The right-wing angel descended upon the forum. Spreading anarchy like aids in a late eighties gay bar. He. The first real hurdle of our beloved forums. He was one of our elite, cunningly disguised as a shit trouble causer.

No point again, I just wanted to bring that up.

[Mr. Goldberg]

Well it's applied schizophrenia my son. Pity the human race don't have an equal penchant for replicating other mental disorders and making it box office. Like...psychosis, Asbhergers , terrets, paranoia.....

Or the nutter on the bus....

"Guess what I've got in this tin of ham ? Eh POEMS !!! That's right !!! And no-one gets off till it's eaten !!! Do you like sponge ? I do I'm not allowed anything sharp !!!! Everybody off !! Everybody off !!!" 

[The Bolshevik Dandy]

I know of who yuo speak-certain facist folks with his font and pulpit!!!
Twas a baptism,but of blood and fire!!!

[Ploe]

I'd say it's more or less applied daydreaming. But you have a medium to express it on, and other egos to clash with.

[Mr. Goldberg]

Feak out. Far Out. In out.

As old Uncle Barney used to say...