The Day I Was A Bickle.

Every night I cry to kingdom come, all the cum and the foul cunt rage disappointment, young porn queens, teenage scum, foul dreamless theatres and guns .

Through the murky fuck mist, the disgusting gutter breath of a hot N.Y.Y evening I saw Her, I saw her and I saw him and it. I kissed the abyss through Jazz swung chapped beer soaked lips. I did not think-oh- but the throb through denim lusts. The smog of lust on the pale land of sanity, the pale leather taxi seat gleaming like my soul.

And I fell in Love, I saw her eyes, I saw her skin and I saw her pathetic pale flesh moving towards mine, in Love. I saw her heart twist for me. You can’t bank on Love, but you can on the theatre-a cheap skin flick, black coffee, apple pie and hatred only $ 2.92. It felt good. Impulse and a dime spared. Did she feel it? Damn! Her name? It stroked my ego and stoked my soul.

I saw tears or rain moving down my window. Pale blue Jazz tried to mirror it. I could think only of the sweat and the hate and the cunt and the so sad evening I nearly did but fuck gave it all away.
Low slung Jazz. It makes me sick. Screw head fuckers, Pin heads. Fucks. No more. No fucking more. Screw head fucks. Take a man to his point and fuck you like a pimple. Screw heads. Dumb nigger fuck pig cunt. All because if her.

Four stories to fuckdom. Cold gin soul and the heart of a child. Felt in my fingers. Beautiful youth. I don;t care if she’s young. High and mighty? Fuck that, fuck the creeps, junkies and degenerate burn outs. Fuck it and honour, fuck her for Love and loss and for humanity.,

Surrender my so sad heart said, surrender and give in to Jack’s fuck-drunk ideas. He’d been a politician once. The scum drunk streets spewed forth the answer. The evening, that same sad N.Y. evening that kissed me with hate and paid me back with kisses of Love.

But it was the scum, the sick, sewer hearted pig-pen swine that make the nights so dark. Shit lost on the tide, in need of a great fucking flush. Darkening my heart with broken bottles and wrists felt with pain. Fuck them!!!

I shall avenge all the lost and punch-drunk stupid, the raped, the dumb and cock lost young. This city Is carrion meat vermin. I will avenge it. To live and die in Hell, like the rest of the cunts, like the rest of them. Paper handed, no love shared , no portion of the heart spared. But for me, not for them, Love and death for them. For me blood and lust and satisfaction. I can rest with my heart clear,

Driving the graveyard shift with the shovel pounding on my heart, To see and smell the scum rise and breed in the street. To feel their warm hot animal death breath against my lost own. Their dumb fucking pigeon opinions, plankton thought. To know all that and know you’re returning back to the rank, to know I can rest easy knowing I’ve done my fucking job.